Moods pt.II

Despondency is my natural state. It's only fantasies that provide me temporary happiness, whether they be of success, power, sex, popularity, love, wealth, or whatever else. Problems occur when I start to confuse this fantasy with reality, which always catches up with it sooner or later. I'm brought back to reality with a thud, and what was once despondency is now despair. I like what Virginia Woolf says through one of her characters in Between the Acts: "This is death...when illusion fails." Not that Woolf was suggesting this, but maybe life is the biggest illusion of all.

I'll end with the lyrics to Nine Inch Nail's Eraser (if anyone comes across the T-shirt with these printed on it, please tell me. I saw someone wearing it at Blink a few weeks back, it's awesome. Rare though, I don't think they make it anymore):

Need you
Dream you
Find you
Taste you
Fuck you
Use you
Scar you
Break you
Lose me
Hate me
Smash me
Erase me
Kill me
Kill me
Kill me
Kill me